Here's a new list for your indulgence!
Energizer Bunny arrested -- charged with battery.
A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.
Practice safe eating -- always use condiments.
A Freudian slip: when you say one thing but mean your mother.
Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.
If electricity comes from electrons does that mean that morality comes from morons?
A hangover: the wrath of grapes.
Corduroy pillows: are making headlines.
A book on voyeurism: a peeping tome?
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
Banning the bra: was a big flop.
Sea captains: don't like crew cuts.
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Successful diet: the triumph of mind over platter.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
A gossip: someone with a great sense of rumor.
Without geometry: life is pointless.
When you dream in color: it's a pigment of your imagination.
Condoms: should be used on every conceivable occasion.
Reading whilst sunbathing makes you: well-red.
When two egotists meet: it's an I for an I.
Alarms: What an octopus is.
Crick: The sound that a Japanese camera makes.
Dockyard: A physician's garden.
Incongruous: Where bills are passed.
Khakis: What you need to start the car in Boston.
Oboe: An English tramp.
Pasteurize: Too far to see.
Propaganda: A gentlemanly goose.
Toboggan: Why we go to an auction.
and finally,
Marriage: the mourning after the knot before.
